My Offering

A year ago this month someone, who I deeply admire, proposed the idea of me starting a blog. I quickly brushed off the idea. It was just hard to imagine that I could offer anything by simply sharing my thoughts and experiences. Nevertheless, the idea was planted, and I began to pray about it. I kept thinking this project would be completely useless and irrelevant if it wasn’t helpful to anyone. My prayers were fueled with a desire for the Lord’s confirmation. I can’t tell you that some supernatural event occurred. Instead a scripture replayed in my mind, like a gentle voice. Colossians 3:17 says, “And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”

Everything that we do we want to be fruitful. But sometimes we have to simply get started. With my prayers I felt a prompting from the Lord, “Do it for Me, I will bless it.” So this blog spot isn’t just a place to share opinions, pictures, or recipes. No, this is my offering. This is a place where I give glory to my God for how great He is.

All of the trials, the lessons, the gifts and blessings are not my own. They are opportunities to glorify the Lord. That is the purpose for each post. And that is my vision for this project. I desire to share these life experiences with as many as will read them. I want to tell the world the great work the Lord does in my life each and every day, and the work He desires to do in each and every individual.

If you feel this is a place you can receive encouragement, would you please help me get the word out and share it with others? By clicking on the “follow” button to your right, you can register to be a part of this venture. Your participation will help in sharing this site to “searchers” on the World Wide Web. If you know a wife, a mom, a working mom, a nurse or nursing student, or anyone going through a trial, I encourage you to ask them to join us here.

Philippians 2:1-2, “Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.”

My prayers are for that encouragement, comfort, tenderness, compassion and unity to be found at the beginning, the end and throughout all of our days. We are the vessels.

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A Beautiful Season

I've seen many different seasons in my life and I've observed them in others’ lives too.Seasons of illness, seasons of healing, seasons of pain and seasons of joy. Seasons of little and seasons of abundance. But as I participated in worship last Sunday morning I observed a season coming right from the platform.  And it is a beautiful one.  It is one of restoration.

This goes back to those sweet memories I have from singing on the youth praise and worship team.  The practices and services were spent with a couple of my closest friends.  Katie sang and Mandy played bass guitar.  These girls were involved in almost all the youth activities.  They participated in Christian groups at school, like Youth Alive and See You at the Pole.  I went to concerts and conventions, football games and movies with these ladies.  They were strong Christian friends of mine, even were bridesmaids in my wedding.

Life took some unanticipated turns early.  About a year after graduating high school, my precious friendship with Mandy began to crumble.  To sum the whole situation up, drugs divided us.  I grieved my friend.  At night, my husband would hold me as I would sob for the girl I no longer knew.  I loved her and couldn’t do anything to change the course she was taking.

Six years passed before we spoke.  It was incredibly painful.  But what was worse was to know the personal torment my friend had to go through before steering back to right path.  She lost custody of her two baby girls, she experienced jail and rehab, among other things.

Some may judge and make comments that she was deserving of any heartache she felt along the way; that she reaped her consequences. But I say that we should all attempt to walk in graciousness because we’ve been given an abundance of it. No, it may not be drugs, but we all fall short.  Romans 3:23 “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard;” and remember in John 8:7 Jesus saying, ““Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”?

Now, let me share with you what I saw last Sunday.  I saw Mandy back on the praise and worship team playing her bass guitar.  I was overjoyed!  Absolutely overjoyed!  My friend illustrates I John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness;” and Ephesians 2:8, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.”  Let me share with you some other gifts the Lord gave to Mandy.  HE restored her children to her.  HE restored her to have a healthy marriage.  HE restored her to be blessed with another baby.  And now she is up on that platform giving HIM glory with talent HE blessed her with long ago.

Nothing is too far out of our Father’s reach.  Nothing can separate from the love He has for us.  It’s never too late.  It’s a testimony that inspires me to continue to pray for those moms we see too often in the NICU.  The unfair reality of a drug addicted baby provokes sadness and anger.  But my hope for these babies is that their moms will, at some point, be like my friend and experience the life changing restorative power of Jesus Christ.  He is my hope.

Be blessed today as you share His love and grace to others; no matter what season they’re in!

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My Greatest Dream

I have several accomplishments the Lord has blessed me with in my life. To name them would merely take up room and be insignificant in comparison to my proudest accomplishment and biggest dream come true. It’s a moment that happened twelve years ago today. A day I received a gift that I grew up fearing I may never have. My life changed when a precious baby girl was born. Brooklyn Nicole Meadows arrived five weeks early, to what I would consider much protest. I was preeclamptic and had to be induced. Our exciting, and might I add nerve racking, adventure started the morning of Thursday, March 1st 2001. Brooklyn made her debut at 11:24p.m. on Sunday, March 4, 2001.

While waiting for Brooklyn’s delivery, I had a lot of time to reflect on our journey. It was one that didn’t start with a positive EPT. No, this story went back to a small burn center where a little girl lay fighting for her life. Walking, romance and children were not in the picture; living was the only objective. But what happens after the miraculous healing? What happens when a child is alive, but faced with uncertainties almost too unbearable for an adult to handle? Well, I don’t know the right answer, but I know what I did. I dreamed.

I dreamed of that simple childhood rhyme, “first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carriage.” My dream got more specific with maturity; a husband and home, a dog and lots of kids. But my insecurities and my self-image had me doubt my dream, even when it started coming true, I was still uncertain.

Brandon and I discussed our plan for a family in premarital counseling. I wanted to be very upfront that there was a big possibility that I wouldn’t be able to have a baby; heavy decisions for an eighteen year old boy. But our love was divine and he was committed regardless. And to our immense delight, we found out we were expecting shortly after our first anniversary.

From my life experiences I have come to believe that the greatest accomplishments come with the greatest challenge. Those life defining moments have been something I’ve fought for, and becoming a mom was no different. At our first prenatal visit, I had my obstetrician inform me that due to the repair on my aorta and the risk associated with me delivering a baby, that she was strongly advising we terminate our pregnancy.

I couldn’t believe the Lord would give me a baby that I might die having. It was a time that I had to walk in complete trust. I stood on Jesus’ words in Matthew 19:26, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

This continued to resound in my heart when we went to the hospital to be induced. I had many emotions. I was concerned for my baby’s safety. I was scared with the unfamiliar terminology. I was insecure about the assumptions being made because of my young age; feeling the need to explain how deeply I desired and already loved my baby.

The day Brooklyn was born ORU was broadcasting a group called The Martins. They sang a song just for me. Not really. But God gave me what I needed in the time I needed it. The words welled up in my soul as they fell upon my ears.

I believe that anything is possible if we understand who Jesus is I believe there's nothing that can stop us if we learn to dream like Jesus did So don't limit your ambition to what's commonly defined God has a special heart for those who walk outside the line Don't be afraid to spread your wings and fly It doesn't hurt to try If you're gonna dream...

Dream big It's the Lord's desire for you to Dream big In everything you say and do You'll see your greatest dream come true 'Cause all of Heaven is dreaming big for you

I received the greatest gift in my life three weeks before my twentieth birthday. My baby girl was placed in my arms and I became a Mom. The impossible was possible. My dream had come true. And it comes true every single day that I get to be the Mom to her and our three boys. I believe my children’s existence was far greater than me. The Lord would have blessed someone with these precious souls, and I’ve been given the greatest honor that He chose me.

Be blessed today as you walk outside the line; as you dream your greatest dream.

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Forever Changed

I’m not a fan of scary movies.  Even suspenseful movies really unsettle me.  The music gets intense, everything seems to slow down, and the agony of the unknown, yet highly anticipated, makes me feel as if I’m choking on my heart.  I find myself hiding my eyes and asking my husband to just tell me what is happening.  Or I take multiple bathroom breaks to reorient myself to reality. It is because of this, that I deeply enjoy Disney movies; not that Disney movies depict much reality.  Rather it is the “happily ever after” and the “when you wish upon a star,” that I love.  You see, I know what it feels like to live out scary moments, to feel the uncertainty of life; those times in life that we truly wish we could hit some kind of skip button or fast forward.  I don’t have to watch a movie to get that kind of thrill.  I’ve had my fair share of those emotions.

After my injury, at the commencement of my rehabilitation, one of my surgeons told my parents that I would physically wear out before my surgeries were ever completely finished.  And to a certain extent, he was right.  I sit here almost twenty-five years later, and still have procedures that I can account for in my future.  Honestly, I am a bit sick of it.  I’ve grown up on and off of the operating table.  But the benefits I’ve gained from living in this body outweigh the cost I’ve had to keep it and make it fully functional.

As sad and depressing as some of this may sound, I have a foundational truth that I focus on:  my life as a burn survivor will NEVER be the same, but it is still good.  That’s the challenge that I see people facing when tragedy arises.  They desperately want their life to be what it was.  They want to come out of trials, and return to some type of normalcy they had before.  The fact is; you will never be the same.  Losses that we encounter, pain that we endure, changes us forever.  But we find a new normal.  And at some point we begin to feel the “happily ever after(s)” again.

These thoughts arose from one of  my orientation assignments to care for two dying babies, from two different families.  One family just wanted the nightmare to end.  They avoided the inevitable, unable to make such unfair decisions and unsettling arrangements.  They just wanted everything to be okay.  The other family displayed such strength and courage, always there at the bedside, even having a photographer capture their baby for the time they had.  My heart broke for both of these mothers.  There is something wrong when you know that a new mom will not be able to take her baby home to the nursery she prepared, and will rather purchase a casket.

I wanted to have that magical remote control, that I’m sure would be available if life were lived as a Disney story, to fast forward those families through that time, to happier times that I know will one day find them again.  I wanted to shield them from the absolute torment only a parent would know to bury their baby.  But as much as I know they will never be the same; I know they will still be okay.

I Peter 5:7 reminds us, “cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”  And further says in verse 10 “and the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself RESTORE you and make you STRONG, FIRM and STEADFAST.”

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The Thrill of Soarin'

There's a song by Crystal Lewis called, "For Such a Time as This." The title may sound familiar. The words are what Mordecai chose to challenge Esther to do the extremely difficult. To summarize the situation, in Esther 3:12-13 we are informed that King Ahasuerus gave instruction to "destroy, to kill, and to annihilate all Jews, young and old, women and children, in one day." Mordecai sent word to Esther, the queen, and commanded that she go to the king and plead with him on behalf of her people. The danger for Esther was that she had not been called by the king, which could cost her her life (Esther 4:11). Mordecai's reply to Esther ended with "And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" None of us can relate to the task set before Esther, but we all have a task, a calling the Lord has set before us. I confront mine each time I go to work.

You see, I was quite content in life when the Lord began to stir something deep inside my heart. My spirit and my mind were unsettled as I knew He was preparing me to do something that He hadn't yet revealed to me. That began nine years ago this month.

I can identify with the description in Crystal Lewis' song of how those "windless waters are so much more peaceful." It would have been easy to give the Lord my list of inadequacies when He revealed to me that I would become a nurse. I could have unnecessarily reminded Him that I was never a strong math or science student and that a bachelor's in nursing meant a bachelor's in science. I could have pleaded that I couldn't be on my legs for extended periods of time. Or used my children, explaining that I couldn't be the mom I wanted to be while pursuing a career.  All excuses to avoid the challenge.

That would have been the windless water path. That would have been the "content to not ask those questions that stir the river, that move the waves."  But the Lord wanted something specific for my life and He will carry it on to completion (Philippians 1:6).

Each time that I step into my unit, and approach the desk to get my assignment I feel completely inadequate.  And I am; on my own. But my Father has equipped me with every good for doing His will (Hebrews 13:21), and He is providing people along the way to pour into my life to make me all He has called me to be. For instance, I spent the first three nights of this week working in our small satellite unit with two other nurses. They casually gave me words of affirmation and encouragement, and they took opportunities to teach me in such respectful and delicate ways. It's humbling and rewarding.

One day, I will look back and be so grateful that I chose to step out in faith to do the difficult. In all reality, I already am, yet I still have so far I hope to go. I love the ending to Crystal's song, "sometimes the thrill of soarin' has to begin with the fear of falling." There are times that we are so afraid of failing that we contemplate never trying. I have to admit that I considered such on the brink of nursing school, but what would I have missed? Look what all I would have missed, and all that is in store!

Climbing higher means a steeper slope. A steeper slope means more discomfort and challenge. Are you in that windless water place? Is God calling you to climb higher?

At times, we don't think what we have to offer is so spectacular. Esther didn't feel extraordinary, but the work the Lord set before her was (read on through Esther 8). And He has set a work before each of us. If we don't step out in faith, if we turn away, then what will we miss?

Be blessed today as you climb higher in Him!

04 For Such A Time As This  click to hear "For Such a Time as This" by Crystal Lewis

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My Valentine

I have movie clip like memories that play through my mind on random occasion.  Some of those memories are amusing to my mind, like when my brother, Jon and I use to catch frogs out of our pool in the off season; I’ll spare you the detail of what we did with them after that.  Some are sad, like when I fell on the gravel road trying to catch up with my family on an afternoon walk after picking a pear off my Grandma’s tree.  It was my first time for stitches.  Others are exciting like when my Aunt Donna visited with her brand new little bitty lhasa apso puppy named, Precious.  Some are fun, like when my cousins, and Jon and I, danced in our grandma’s garage to “Heaven is a Place on Earth,” by Belinda Carlisle.  Then there are those tragic memories, the vision of flames from lying in a burning ditch; followed by the heartbreaking memory of when my Mom and Dad sat beside my hospital bed trying to explain that my brother was dead. There is an array of different genres from these movie clip like memories.  But in light of the recent celebration of Valentine’s Day, I’d like to share some of my favorite with you.  These memories fall into the romantic films category, and it couldn’t be a sweeter story if it came right out of a fairytale.

My husband and I met in August of 1996.  We were introduced to one another at a Driller’s baseball game that hot summer night in Tulsa.  Neither one of us took much interest in one another.  I think it took some time for us to even realize we were being set up by our friends.  We were polite and friendly, but nothing that would classify as love at first sight.  As disinterested as we both recall feeling, it’s quite funny that we still remember how we both looked that night.

Once we officially had met, we then noticed each other more at school.  I was a junior and he was a senior.  I remember sitting in French class one morning and the door was opened to our classroom.   Brandon passed by, then backed up, and waved at me from the hall.  I wasn’t completely sure if he was waving at me or someone else, so I just smiled.  As soon as he walked away, I turned to the girls behind and to both sides of me, and asked if they had waved at “that person” in the hall.  Neither of them had any idea what I was talking about, so I just said, “never mind,” and turned around in my seat feeling on top of the world.

Our friends began to tease us because we started spending a lot of time together, but refused to admit that we were dating.  We told everyone that we were simply spending our extra time together.  Funny how much “extra” time we seemed to all of a sudden have.  We went bowling, to concerts, to the movies and even went fishing.  I think I realized I must have felt something for this guy when he asked me if I liked hockey, and I heard myself say, “I love hockey.”  In honor of the 90s, “whatever!”  He knew me better than I thought because we never went!

I remember the bear he gave me when I had surgery to have my wisdom teeth removed.  I remember how I felt like my heart literally moved when I’d answer the phone and hear his voice on the line.  I remember how we would laugh together; how everyone thought he was so quiet but I got to see his humor and wit.  And many months later, I remember that unforgettable moment, our first kiss.

One of my most treasured possessions is our wedding invitation that one of my husband’s aunts had framed for us as a wedding gift.  It says, “a glance; a smile; became a friendship; grew into love.”   My husband gave me the greatest gift of his friendship and God gave us the greater gift of love.  With all of my being I had asked the Lord to send me someone that would see me as HE saw me, because I Samuel 16:7 says, “The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

I was a seven year old little girl when I looked in the mirror and saw what people looked at; my scars.  I grieved then for what I thought I may never have; someone to love me and cherish me and honor me.  I feared I would never walk down that aisle in a beautiful white gown to a handsome groom.  I contemplated the possibility that I may have to settle for companionship rather than wait for passion.

But my memories are the most romantic I could have ever dreamed.  I have a love to call my own.  I have a Valentine who does not look at the things people look at; no, he looks at the things my Father looks at; the heart.  And that is the kind of man, who will always hold mine.

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The Most of Our Days

Services were held today for a man I didn’t know very well. He occasionally visited my family when I was growing up, and when I saw him I don’t remember ever embracing or even speaking much. Although I didn’t know him very well, his daughter is my best friend and my mother. Yes, the man I speak of is my grandfather. I had three grandparents when I entered this world. My Dad’s dad passed away when my Dad was just entering adulthood. Therefore, I had my Dad’s mom, and my Mom’s parents, who were divorced. My Grandpa had been remarried for many years by the time I came along, and he and his wife lived somewhat of a distance away.

The name “Grandpa” never held the endearment to me that it does for most people. I never remember my Grandpa expressing a sense of pride, or even a fondness of me for that matter. It wasn’t until my Dad became a grandpa that I began to revere the term with warm emotion.

This all might seem a bit disheartening, and I guess it is, but thank the Lord there’s more. You see, my Grandpa’s life didn’t reflect the traditional pattern you’d probably expect. Because of the road he traveled, he missed out on many memories with his grandchildren. But he wasn’t a foolish man; he could recognize a second chance when it was presented to him.

It was after my children were born that I began to get acquainted with this grandpa of mine. He had meals with us in our home, he pitched in and became part of our home projects, he snuck treats to my children before dinner, and he laughed with us. I learned that he loved strawberry spring salad, that he liked to watch any sport on TV, even golf (yes, golf), and that the Styrofoam cup he carried in the evening had a hefty dose of Mr. Daniels. After some time, “Papa Cecil” began to mean quite a lot to us. My fourth child especially had a unique connection with his great grandfather, and saying goodbye at three and a half is not only puzzling but heartbreaking too.

Life is so unpredictable. Change is perpetual. And praise God, that His love is unconditional. My nine year old son opened the memorial service in prayer today with a prayer he wrote. He said, “Lord Jesus, thank You for all the time we have got to have and spend with Papa Cecil.” The time didn’t go the way of a storybook. But it didn’t have to. Although I didn’t know my Grandpa as I would have liked, I got to see my children form a special bond with him, which created that endearing place in my heart. In the end all that mattered was we got to have what we needed, and that was time; time to share life and make memories.

Expectations can be tricky. It’s good to have expectations for our own personal growth and for our children’s growth and development. However, my expectation of a “Grandpa” could have prevented my entire family from experiencing the gift of our “Papa Cecil.” Nothing is ideal in life. My Aunt Donna frequently says, “It is what it is.” And sometimes we just have to make the most of what “it is.”

The Word tells us in Ephesians 5:16 to make the most of every opportunity. The Message translation says; “make the most of every chance you get.” Sometimes we have to set our expectations aside and make the most of what we have while we have it.

Bless you and yours as you make the most of your days together.

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Be the Difference

It was a very “normal” Monday morning in our home this morning. We were all hustling around getting ready to begin another week of school, activities, errands and work. The day quickly unfolded to be anything but normal. In our hometown, in what I hold as our little “Mayberry”, tragedy hit. A teenage boy made the decision to end his life in the school bathroom. I cannot begin to put into words the heartbreak I feel thinking of the hopelessness he must have felt to carry out that act. My daughter’s school was yards away from the campus in which these events transpired. She is quickly approaching twelve; therefore, was quite aware and very sensitive to the matter. My oldest son, who is 9, overheard conversations and gathered what happened. I ask for the Lord’s guidance and wisdom in addressing these topics with my children. It’s beyond my comprehension, so I know it must be so difficult for them.

Tonight, as I tucked my older children into bed, our conversations surrounded one question: What can we do to make a difference? I used a few examples of people in history who stood up for what was right, even though it wasn’t easy. I explained to them that if they ever knew of someone being bullied that they should stand up for that person, even when it’s not the easy, convenient or the popular thing to do. My son made a point that if we stood up for those being bullied, then they might know how important they are and then have confidence to stand up for themselves.

A simple statement from the mouth of a child, but how often do we overlook it? Just after midnight I posted my weekly blog about our cloudy days. I attempted to communicate that even in those cloudy days we can call to the Lord, who helps us. But how many people do not have that relationship to carry them? How many people have one cloudy day after another until they’re walking in complete darkness? How many people need someone to stand up for them, to bridge that gap for them?

My older children and I ended our discussion with prayer. We prayed for this young man’s family, we prayed for the students and faculty at the school, and we prayed that we would be a light that others would be drawn to, that we could share the hope and love of our Heavenly Father.

Psalm 29:11 The Lord gives STRENGTH to His people, the Lord blesses His people with PEACE.

Believing for supernatural strength and peace in this loss and sadness-

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Cloudy Day

You know those days that you feel completely frustrated? I just experienced a few of those myself. Four days ago my closet door, which happens to also be the door to our safe room, became jammed. This wouldn’t have been too frustrating of a situation except that it was not discovered until fifteen minutes before I had to leave our house, and I was in my pajamas at the moment! My husband worked for five hours trying to unjam a door that can withstand the force of an F5 tornado, even teleconferencing the instruction of a locksmith. It wasn’t until the next morning at 5:50am that my husband completely sawed the door handle off. He was my knight in shining armor, rescuing our wardrobes, which he and I needed for work that morning.

Three days ago I got some disappointing news that I missed out on getting to move to day shift at work. I don't dislike working nights in particular, it's just sleeping during the day that has presented the greatest challenge to my body. But for the time being, I must buck up and deal with it. Two days ago I was informed that, despite my genuine efforts, I disappointed one of my closet and dearest friends. Furthermore, my children were not up to par on their behavior and the instruction in which their father and I have so diligently poured into them. The consequences heaped on them put a damper on the weekend and further contributed to that consistent feeling of frustration. Today my three year old inquisitively swallowed three dimes. I think. Through questioning I gathered that they were small and silver. He identified dimes as the culprit, but again, he’s three.

My expression here isn’t to vent. My husband fulfills that obligation so admirably. No, my point is to share that nothing terribly bad has to happen for us to feel like we are constantly one step behind and losing at every angle. It’s from the smallest of detail to the most important of relationships that can make us lose our grip and make us feel, well, like losers.

No doubt this feeling of defeat delayed my post. Yesterday my thoughts were bombarded with feelings of inadequacy and failure. Nothing quite gets me down than knowing that others are down on me. Even though I aim to make this blog a place of encouragement, hope and joy, I feel that the Lord wanted me to take just a moment to recognize that yes, we all have crummy days. I’m not speaking of significant loss and tragedy; I’ll save that for another post, because praise the Lord, He’s given me a testimony in overcoming those times as well. No, today is just about picking our head up when all the little things seemed to be stacked against us. When we just want to scratch the day, go to bed early and start over again tomorrow. We all have those days, but what do we do with them? This is what resonated in my heart these last few frustrating days: “I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2. By the way, the entire Psalm is great for a pick me up.

Bless you all as you give glory to the Father in the sunny and cloudy days. He speaks to us in all of them and He makes each one brighter as we seek Him. Need help, just ask. He is always there; even when we’re just frustrated.

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Because He First Loved Me

Many of us grew up singing, “Oh, How I Love Jesus.” The phrase of that special hymn, “because He first loved me,” has been a reoccurring theme. My husband and I have had conversations about our witness as Christians. We never want to be comfortable with sin, but we don’t want to be so uncomfortable that we render ineffective for reaching others with the salvation message. After all, Jesus did come to call sinners (Luke 5:32). And praise God that He did, because that’s exactly how every person comes to Christ (Romans 3:23). No matter how polished or poised, we still come as sinners.

Titus 3:3-7 “At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. 4 But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, 5 he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, 6 whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.”

We were in this terrible state, and nothing that we could do could change that. But God’s mercy could, and did.

This was illustrated before me as I had the opportunity to care for a baby who had been born to a drug addicted mother. The state of this baby upon birth was bleak, uncertain, and disheartening. But regardless of the infant’s condition, there was a mom and dad wanting that baby. Adopted parents; ones who had decorated a nursery, prepared the home, and arranged the finances to welcome that baby as their own. They didn’t turn their backs when they were informed of the extensive medical care needed. They didn’t give up when they realized the baby they wanted wasn’t a healthy one. They loved this baby. And they loved this baby first.

My husband says, “I serve a God who loved me before I ever loved Him.” Isn’t that divine love? We bring nothing but a bleak, uncertain and disheartening soul, and when His kindness and love appears, our lives and our future are changed.

Oh how I love Jesus!

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My Kind of Medicine

I’m a people watcher. When I’ve had moments of waiting on someone, at the mall, at a restaurant, at Disney World or Disneyland, I catch myself watching those that pass by. Some I observe longer than others, depending on the duration of their time within my proximity. I watch their interactions with those in their group; I take note of their fashion, possibly gaining a tip or two; but above all, I am always impressed by their facial expression, whether positively or negatively.Do people realize what a statement they make by the expression they wear? I’m not a fashion guru. I am always seeking advice and tips on what goes well together and what is current. I never want to get stuck in a rut of an era. Because of this endless quest, it’s obvious to me how much effort people put into their look. Some say that their “look” is one way they express themselves. I have to say that I truly believe that. So what are we expressing when choose to walk out our door with such unhappy faces? Sometimes I think that maybe people believe they look smart, or pretty, or maybe they believe others take them more seriously if they don’t smile. Maybe they’re trying to be intimidating, or they believe it expresses confidence. Many times, I think it may be just the opposite. Maybe some people are perhaps very shy and don’t want to be noticed. Whatever the reason, is it possible that our facial expression can be powerful enough to impact others? Those we don’t even know? I definitely believe so. We tend to minimize the value we can give to another. We just don’t realize the influence that we can make. We can’t, and sometimes don’t even try to, imagine what others, complete strangers, may be going through. That person in line with you at Starbucks, the teller at the bank, the person you pass in the grocery store. We just don’t consider what encouragement a friendly face may do for those individuals. Recently, as I was walking into work to get my assignment for the night, I passed by a parent. I smiled at her and simply said, “Hello.” She said, “You are the friendliest nurse in this place.” The fact is there are countless “friendly” nurses in our unit. But my interaction may have been timed to be the smile she needed at the exact time she needed it. Proverbs 17:22 tells us what a change our attitude can make, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” No doubt, she was in need of some “good medicine.” I love it when people smile at me. This is probably why I am so intentional to smile at others. Matthew 7:12 tells us, “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.” Invest those smiles today. Give that simple act of love and encouragement. It will be returned to you just when you’ll need it most. Even more often, you’ll be blessed by initiating such kindness.

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From the Early Days

07.22.2012 I sit here today, on the eve of starting my nursing career, experiencing feelings of relief, gratitude, excitement and anxiety. You might ask, “How in the world can you experience relief and anxiety at the same time?” Well, you’d probably have to have experienced nursing school to understand such a statement.

Two years ago when I began nursing school, I stood on Romans 8:23, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” I knew that God had called me to become a nurse; therefore, I knew that all the arrangements made with my children, every financial need, and every academic challenge would be provided for, because the Word told me that ALL things work for the good. I loved God and I knew I was called. Nursing is my ministry.

This does not mean I hadn’t a care in the world. Quite the opposite. I had numerous people who shared my vision and were enlisted to help me achieve my goal. My fear of failure was immense.  I couldn't let them down. But that is when we put our faith into action. That is when we not only read the Word, but we pray the Word and it becomes embedded in our heart and soul. That is when the Word is alive and active in our life. I ate up every experience I could in nursing school. Like the operation to repair an inguinal hernia. Disregard the fact that I almost fainted and had to be carried off the surgical area that the surgeon had so graciously invited me. I displayed much greater composure in others. Like the opportunity I had to observe skin grafting on a burn patient; a procedure near and dear to my heart being a burn survivor myself. I’ve watched a Guillain–Barré patient undergo plasmapheresis; I was terrified when I participated in chest compressions during a code; and I had the opportunity to participate in the care of a neonate on ECMO (Extracorporeal membrane oxygenation).

These are undoubtedly highlights. It was in moments like these that I experienced that feeling of gratitude I mentioned earlier; gratitude for the opportunity and exposure. Each encounter also brought feelings of excitement to learn. However, these moments being behind me are what cause such feelings of relief. Then, I had the pressures of a demanding nursing program and the future challenge of NCLEX. Now, that is all behind me. I sit here today with a beautiful line of credentials after my name, “BSN, RN.” I made it. With the Lord’s favor, I accomplished that goal. But in the process, I learned how easily mistakes can happen. I learned that at the end of the day, even nurses, in our limitations of humanity, make mistakes. And that fact brings me much anxiety. I became a nurse to help people; to save lives. And I pray that I never set diligence on the back burner. I pray that while I plan to grow in confidence as a nurse, that I never lose humility.

Today I am focusing on Ephesian 3:20, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.” I will stand on this scripture as I face this new season. I believe that if God called me, then He equipped me. I believe that in His power He will work through me. That He will do more than I can measure or imagine for the benefit of my patients, my children, my marriage, and my walk with Him, as I continue to answer His call.

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The Power of a Name

I once read that one of the wonderful things about having a baby is getting to name them.  My experience was completely different.  When we were expecting our daughter, my husband and I felt tremendous pressure to give her the most perfect name;  a name that she would be proud to carry for all the days of her life.  The feeling didn't change much when our second child came along.  Imagine the anxiety of doing that four times.  Can anyone identify with that challenge; the challenge of naming your child? However difficult that may seem, it comes down to the fact that our name is much more our responsibility than the person who gave it to us.  Think about a business.  Businesses work very hard to make a good name for themselves.  Success in business is highly influenced by reputation.  So overall, it's not so much the name that I gave to my children, as what they choose to do with it.

My husband and I often remind our children that their actions and their decisions are a reflection of our family, because they carry our name.  Positively or negatively, they represent our family.  Just like we represent our Savior.  We not only carry our birth name or family name, we carry the name of Jesus Christ.  And THERE IS power in THAT name (Philippians 2:10-11).

I pray that when people hear my name that they think positive thoughts and feel happy emotions.  I pray that the name Heather Meadows is consistent with the name Christian.  I desire for my reputation to be one of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).

It's not always easy, but in all situations let us find ways to promote our name in love.  When we suffer the consequences of someone's selfish acts, when we are snarled at because of someone else's inconvenience, or when we are mistreated by those we love; let us represent ourselves well and promote the One that forgives all the mistakes we have to bring.  There is no other name like His (Acts 4:11-12).

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. I Peter 4:8

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New Year Label

Yesterday my six year old son told me that our black lab puppy was a stray.  My husband and I both quickly corrected his misunderstanding, telling him that we paid money for Daisy Mae; that we bought her from a man who loved labs and wanted other families to have a good dog like he did.  This small and somewhat insignificant conversation led my thoughts in a direction of accomplishments and credentials. You see, our family puppy is AKC registered, just like our almost 13 year-old black lab, Bailey.  My husband and I have had a positive experience investing in a registered dog.  We have a sense of security knowing that there are standards that must be met to have that label on a litter of puppies.

Some may scoff at our motivation to purchase a branded puppy when there are so many who need adopted and rescued.  Even so; all dogs need a home, no matter the route.  But my question is, don’t we all do that in a way?  Don’t we all look at certifications, accomplishments and credentials and see someone who had ambition, who had dedication and tenacity, someone who buckled down to reach an achievement?  Those labels communicate that this individual met a set of standards.

Coming into the New Year we are inundated with messages of resolution and change.  It would be interesting to know the number of people who are committed to a goal simply by a New Year’s resolution.  I imagine it’s just not enough.  We can’t allow the world to tell us what label we should wear.  It’s not the vehicle we drive, the home we live in, the money we make, or for goodness sake, the dress size we wear.  Our labels must be rooted first and foremost in our walk with the Lord.  The Word tells us in Matthew 6:33; “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

This truth has been illustrated to me in my life.  I grew up with an importance and value put upon education.  My Dad was the first person in his family to graduate from college.  It was an accomplishment laden with challenge.  He was thirty-one, divorced, with a child, by the time he finished.  He wanted it to be easier for his children, but sometimes the greatest satisfaction comes through the hardest challenges.  Sometimes the Lord’s calling isn’t in a step-by-step process that is comfortable for us.  I experienced that as a wife and mother of four trying to complete not only my bachelor’s degree, but nursing school.  It wasn’t easy, but it was wonderful! It was wonderful because I knew, without a doubt, that I wasn’t seeking a label, I was being obedient to a magnificent calling that the Lord placed upon my life.  And He used my children to reveal it to me.  It just took time, and His timing is perfect.

As we step into the New Year, seek the Lord first.  Our greatest accomplishments are found in Him.  He is our standard.  There is no greater label than “child of God.”

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Welcome!

I sat in my old high school gymnasium the other night for my daughter’s 6^th grade band concert.  As I sat waiting for the children to take their places and the concert to commence, I began to glance around that gymnasium.  This was the place I spent much time as a young lady.  This was the place I chummed with friends; cheered my “bestie” on for basketball; sang the National Anthem with passion and zeal. I can’t remember the last time that I occupied a seat on the bleacher, but memories flooded my mind as if they were more recent than not.  Then I started to read those big “State Championship” banners.  I was the class of 1999; the year the girls golf team and boys baseball team both took state.

I didn’t play sports.  Anyone who knew me then, or knows me now for that matter, could testify that I seek out great conversation over competitive play.  I never did shine in sports, so I moved on to other areas I felt more adept.  The fact that I had absolutely nothing to do with those accomplishments was nil.  It was the fact that I was a part of a winning class.  I felt pride in reflecting back to those days when we celebrated that great accomplishment of our athletes.

Don’t we all want to be part of a winning team?  Don’t we all want to be part of something great?  I’ve never heard people brag about their bleak work environment, or boast of their rocky relationships.  No, we all want to be steeped in the pride of winners.  And because of the love Jesus has for us and the sacrifice He made, we are exactly that—winners!  I John 3:1a “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!”

I pray that as you join me for these blog posts that you feel you are a part of something special, uplifting and encouraging.  I pray that you know that you are part of a winning team.  As we approach Christmas, reflect on the peaceful truth that Christ came for you, His precious child.  You are the most valuable gift to Him!

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